My latest dream is about The Big Blue Blob. You, see, I’ve been having very strange dreams lately. My unconscious is trying to work stuff out – emotions, anxieties, stresses, relationships or lack thereof. The dreams are driving my conscious mind crazy. I mean every night it’s like a Fellini movie – that’s the famous Italian film director in the 1960s who created stories with people who are more bizarre than the next and who usually epitomize one or two facets of human nature. And human nature being what is is – totally unpredictable and mostly unstable – is a force to reckon with.
The other night I had a dream about a big blue blob. In my dream I was watching a young boy of about 12 or 13 looking out a rectangle window of a what seemed to be a basement because the boy was eye level with the ground. I peeked over his shoulder to see what he was looking at and his eyes were on a gelatinous big blue blob with huge eyes and a red oversized mouth. The blob was shaped in the form of a Hostess Twinkie only it was larger at the bottom. The big blue blog moved minimally from side to side as his gel sloshed around with the movement.
A note here: I should be telling this dream to my Jungian therapist; however, he retired three years ago after he made a killing on a prostate pharmaceutical stock and moved to Washington state to look at nature and live in peace for all eternity. Something must have happened to him because two weeks ago he shockingly resurfaced and called some of his clients and ask them if they would like further therapy over the phone at $250 an hour. He wisely didn’t call me.
The story continues when the young boy turns right and spies a very large scorpion with a poisonous stinger as big as a sword. The boy and the scorpion had a stare down that lasted most of the night in my dream. Then the scorpion began to move at glacial speed to take a better look at the boy. His pointer sword came within inches from the boy’s face.
“I need a sword,” the boy said to no one in particular because I was merely an observer in the dream.
I whispered or thought, “No, you don’t need a sword.” My opinion made no difference since the boy didn’t sense another presence.
Suddenly, and without warning, the scorpion lunged his poison pointer at the boy and struck him in the face. It felt as if I was stabbed and poisoned. My body and mind shut down and when I opened my eyes the young boy was outside next to the big blue blob and he had been transformed into, what else? – a big blue blob. But the young boy couldn’t keep his shape. He was melting down and there was nothing that the other big blue blob could do as he looked on helpless. Like the wicked witch of the west in “The Wizard of Oz, the young boy, aka the second big blue blob, was completely deflated and collapsed without movement, without life.
I could barely get out of bed the next morning. I was lifeless and sad that my story was so damn sad. The young boy did everything right. He kept his distance from the scorpion, didn’t provoke him, didn’t talk to him, kept from judging the stinger’s force, didn’t use a violent instrument against the scorpion. The boy was simply still.
You know that in a dream the person who dreams is everyone else in the dream? I was the boy and was the scorpion and I was the big blue blob. I was experiencing all three entities but each separately. Just as our stories in real life add to the meaning of our life, so, too, do the stories in our dreams. My fears and anxieties about life were being framed by that dream. What happened in the dream was something for a my therapist to sort out but I couldn’t afford the analysis. My friend told me to let my unconscious wrestle with the meaning and sort out the source of the angst I’m not dealing with in my conscious mind. I thought that was good advice since I cannot do anything about that dream or any other dream I’m having nightly.
It strikes me that everyone lives by the rules – or mostly everyone – but sometimes the rules don’t apply. Example: the American dream: work hard and you get a house and a car and you’ll be able to afford college for your children and you’ll have a retirement nest egg that won’t run out before you die. Wrong! That flew out the window 10 or more years ago.
So forget the rules and live by a set of standards you set for yourself and see what transpires:
1) Wake up every day and grow in your own self-awareness not someone else’s expectations and stand by your truth
2) Think for yourself: be the master of your own thoughts, letting the preoccupations go so you can advance the cause of your own individuation
3) Set an intention and go for what you believe in and apply and decode what you give your attention to
Most surely, living your own story is the best of all dreams.